Minnesota family law attorney

You’re on the hunt for the perfect family law attorney. You’ve looked into your prospects’ case history, academic credentials, and online reviews. You know everything important about each potential attorney — but do you, really? What about their values? This oft-forgotten concept should play a top role in your final decision.

Why You And Your Attorney Should Share Values

Trust forms the backbone of any attorney-client relationship. As a trusting client, you are more likely to share sensitive details with your lawyer, free from fear of undue judgment. If you intrinsically disagree with your attorney’s basic values, you’ll never trust him or her to act in your best interests.

For example: if you’re part of an LGBT couple and are eager to adopt a child or draft a prenuptial contract, you’ll want to work with an attorney who clearly values same-sex marriage. While a lawyer with different values may technically be capable of handling your case, this person will not tackle the matter with the drive or compassion you deserve.

Identify Key Values and Look For Associated Terminology

Before you launch your search for the perfect attorney, take some time to highlight your personal values. How do you define an ideal attorney? Note both red flags and qualities that would increase that all-important trust factor.

Next, determine how your values might translate into marketing jargon. The language your lawyer uses on social media, in blog posts, and in print materials can say a lot about his or her basic values. Key marketing terms could include:

  • Small town values
  • Diversity and inclusion
  • Boutique law firm
  • Integrity
  • Spirit of cooperation
  • Trial-ready

Vet Prospects Thoroughly

Not all attorneys blatantly broadcast their values online or via print marketing materials. Even those who do may interpret common descriptors differently. Vet potential attorneys to determine what they really think. Ask targeted questions. You should come away with a clear understanding of each attorney’s legal philosophy.

The Brown Law Offices, P.A. values honest, transparent representation. Get in touch today to learn more about this respected Minnesota law firm.

Some couples wait years before getting the green light to adopt. This is (or at least, by all rights, should be) an exhilarating time. But the adoption process can also be exhausting, consuming emotional and financial resources. And life’s other stresses can add up as well.

What happens when a couple getting an adoption decides to part ways? Does the process necessarily terminate? If not, who gets custody of the child, and how does child support and visitation work?

The answers to these (and similar) questions depend sensitively on the details of your relationship, your financial situation and where you are in the adoption process. Getting a divorce will not necessarily ruin your chances, but it can greatly complicate matters.

Factors affecting your next steps can include:

  • The best interests of the child. If a court thinks that letting the adoption continue would present a hardship to the child in question, it will likely choose to halt the process.
  • The wishes of the birth parents. The birth parents may stipulate that they want the child to go to a stable, married family. Or the agency may put a stop to the adoption because of the anticipated divorce-related chaos. The birth parents may also decide to let the adoption continue with one or both custodial parents.
  • Special constraints on international adoptions. Some international adoption agencies impose specific rules about what kind of home can welcome a child.

Whatever you do, don’t stay married just because you want a child. It’s not fair to you, and it’s not fair to the child. Suspicious circumstances surrounding your divorce could result in the courts halting your adoption as well. Adoption during divorce can be tricky, but it is possible. For more information about protecting your Minnesota adoption process, contact us for a confidential initial consultation.

 

One of the biggest reasons second marriages end in divorce is conflict between step-parents and children from the previous marriage. If you want your blended family to succeed, foster a positive relationship between the kids and the step-parent. Consider implementing the following tips and ideas:

1. Create a culture of respect. The family unit can’t get along as a unit unless the individual members love and respect each other. To foster those feelings, allow the step-parent some one-on-one time with each child, so everyone can get to know each other better. Schedule a half-hour outing for the step-parent and step-child each week (a trip to the ice cream parlor, a shopping spree, or a trip to park).

2. Buckle in for the emotional roller coaster. Children experiencing major life transitions are emotional. Allow the outbursts to occur. Instead of reacting, make eye contact, and listen to the child vent. Even small things like dropped candy bars and routine activities can be frustrating. Learn to listen to the frustrations (and the deeper needs and feelings behind them) without feeling like you need to fix them or alter coping strategies.

3. Get it off your chest – constructively. Parents and step-parents need to vent, too. Find a confidante outside the family (e.g. a therapist or a patient friend) to work through your own feelings about what’s happening. Don’t complain about the ex or your parenting frustrations in front of the children.

4. Participate in activities that unite the family. You don’t want to leave anyone out. Blended families face challenges when parents and their biological children go off together to do their own thing. That can be great for their relationships, but if the step-parent can never be included in your activities together with your children, tension will inevitably follow. Relieve that tension by finding things all of you can do together.

5. If possible, involve the other parent in solutions. Too many times, parents and step-parents speak negatively about the other parent in front of children. That badmouthing will cause unnecessary tension and even lead to charges of parental alienation. If the other parent isn’t meeting your needs, involve him or her in a solution. Empty complaining won’t make your situation better. And, again, keep negative, derisive comments about the other parent to yourself and away from the children.

Ask your family law questions in a private consultation with one of our Minnesota family law attorneys by calling 763-323-6555 today.