Divorce is a stressful, significant occurrence in the life of all who are involved. The impact of divorce upon children cannot be ignored. Reputable divorce attorneys, and, more importantly, the Court, will put the interests of the children at the top of the priority list. Here are a few key points and suggestions to keep in mind as you move forward:
Keep Communication Open With Your Spouse/ Former Spouse. As long as children are involved, you and your former spouse will have to work together. Your children will suffer to the degree that you and your former spouse cannot communicate or cooperate.
Get Professional Help To Deal With Your Emotions. Please do your best to keep emotions out of the case. Your feelings of anger, pain, and betrayal are understandable, but expressing them inappropriately in court may interfere with your ability to provide a judge with the information they need. If you have trouble with the hostility, anger, or depression that often occurs in divorces, don’t hesitate to get counseling to help you through it. A good counselor can help you, and your children, get through this difficult time and avoid having the anger become counterproductive.
Encourage and Support Parenting Time. If you are the custodial parent and the court has ordered parenting time between your children and your ex-spouse, you have a duty to encourage parenting time. You must do more than just stay out of the way or leave the choice to the children. Encourage your children to see your former spouse frequently and to enjoy the contact. Never use support or parenting time as a lever or bargaining chip in dealing with the other parent. However, if mental health, chemical dependency, abuse or other issues arise and you think your children are not safe with your ex-spouse, seek professional advice on what to do.
Give Your Children a Chance. The way you and your spouse handle your divorce will have an enormous impact upon your children. If you argue and fight, their problems and pain will be magnified. By acting reasonably, you can help your children through one of the most difficult events of their lives.