A parenting time expeditor works to resolve parenting time disputes by interpreting and enforcing an existing court order. Some parties never use the expeditor, even if appointed, because no conflicts arise. Others use them once. Still others...quite regularly.

Expeditors are supposed to first mediate disputes between parents. If the parents are unable to come to an agreement on their own, the expeditor issues a written decision.

Once a dispute is brought to the attention of the expeditor, they expeditor will meet with the parties in a relatively short period of time - often the same day, by telephone.

If a decision is required of the expeditor, it must be consistent with the existing order. In other words, an expeditor does not have the authority to create new schedules or conditions of visitation.

The decision can include an award of compensatory parenting time, along with an award of attorney's fees and costs. The opinion must be written and mailed to each party, and is subject to review by the district court if either party requests a hearing. Usually the expeditor's decision is subject to "appeal" to the district court for a period of 14 days. Thereafter, the right to have the matter addressed by the court is extinguished.

Either party can move the court to remove the parenting time expeditor, but must show "good cause" for doing so. Such a feat can be rather difficult, but tempting to those who are not happy with the decisions of the expeditor.

Custody is an emotionally-charged issue, with a lot of uncertainty for parents and kids.

Topics in this podcast include the difference between physical custody and legal custody, joint custody as compared to sole custody, the "best interest of the child" factors and the key facts judges look toward in making custody decisions.

Run Time: 12:52

The Minnesota courts web site provides a number of resources for litigants who may encounter a Guardian Ad Litem as part of their case:

• Online GAL Brochure, in English, Spanish, Hmong and Somali.
• GAL district manager contact information.
• General program information, such as goals, values and policy.

Helpful post this week from Ben Stevens' South Carolina Family Law Blog. A trusted colleague of Stevens, Joanne Hughes Burkett,  family court Guardian Ad Litem, authored a guest article for parents entitled "What This Guardian Ad Litem Wants Parents and Parties to Know."

Here's what Burkett says:

• A Guardian ad Litem (GAL) is not your child’s guardian. A guardian is a person who legally has the care and management of a child. Typically, this is a parent. The role of the Guardian ad Litem is to assist the Family Court Judge in ascertaining the best interests of your child.
• The Guardian ad Litem will NOT make the final decision about custody and visitation. Only the Family Court Judge can make that decision. The Guardian ad Litem’s report is only one of the things the Judge will consider in deciding what is best for your child.
• The Guardian ad Litem’s role as legal advocate for your child ends at the Final Hearing, unless that Order is appealed. We are not their GAL forever.
• You control how expensive the case is, and, by and large, the Guardian ad Litem’s fee, which you will have to pay. Be careful not to run up the bill.
• If you think there is something the Guardian ad Litem needs to know, tell your lawyer first. It could affect the strategy of your case. If the GAL needs to know, your lawyer can write, fax, call, or email the information.
• What you tell me is NOT confidential. Because I am not your lawyer, I do not have a duty to keep in confidence anything you tell me.
• I cannot give you legal advice, so if you have questions or concerns, talk to your attorney.
• All Guardians ad Litem do their work differently. Ask your lawyer how to best work with the GAL in your case.
• The less a child knows about the litigation, the more impressed I am with the parties.

Thanks to Ms. Burkett for her thoughts.

HF69

This issue has come up for several years now...but not when Republicans controlled the Minnesota House and Senate. Will that make a difference?

You can read the entire bill here. In the meantime, here are some of the proposed provisions that modify (underlined) existing law:

• Joint physical custody means the parents shall share time with the children as equally as possible;
• ...the legislature declares that public policy is advanced and the well-being of Minnesota's children is promoted through the recognition of both parents' fundamental freedoms to actively participate in the care, custody, and companionship of their children...
• In cases of marital dissolution or unmarried parentage, when paternity has been established, both parents enjoy a rebuttable presumption of joint legal and physical custody of their children.

Here are some comments posted by a good cross section of family practitioners today:

• "This is a thoroughly bad bill, it is largely a political viewpoint about how the world should be, much of which is at variance with reality."
• "I think this bill has some problems even big problems, but overall the concept is sound."
• "Practicing in greater Minnesota, I can tell you I’d rather have our legislature spend money helping us to better implement the best interest standard, rather than on changing the current structure we have."'
• "The bill creates almost a mandate for joint physical custody. I think it is irresponsible."
• "How is it constitutional, or in the best interests of the children, to explicitly NOT start the parents on equal grounds?"

I invite your comments as well. We'll keep you posted on the progress of Drazkowski's efforts. 

New emphasis has been placed on the actual amount of parenting time that has been awarded, as opposed to mere labels. For that reason, the label, itself, has basically become meaningless. Some, including me, predict the end of the label in the next five to seven years.

The support guidelines now discount child support for an obligor (the one who pays) if they spend a certain amount of parenting time with their child, or children. Three broad categories exist: uninvolved (less than 10% of the available time with children), involved (between 10% and 45% of the available time with children), and equal (above 45% of the available time with children. The measuring tool is usually overnights.

Parents with less than 10% parenting time receive no credit against their basic child support payment. Parents who are "involved" receive a 12% credit. Parents who are "equal" receive a 50% credit.

We are frequently asked about what sort of parenting schedule might be awarded to a current, or potential, client. With that, we thought it would be helpful to outline the "typical" parenting time schedules that exist, along with the correlating discount percentage against basic child support.

Limited/High Risk Schedules: No child support credit available, as parenting time is less than 10% of available time.

• Supervised Visits: Visits limited to a supervised safety center a few hours per week. Typically reserved for cases of endangerment. No basic child support credit.
• As Agreed Upon: Visits are limited, but unsupervised. Scheduled ad hoc. No basic child support credit.

Typical Non-Custodial Schedules: A 12% child support credit is afforded, as time exceeds 10% of available time, but is less than 45% of available time.

• Every-Other Weekend (F-Su): Bare minimum schedule for involved non-custodial parents. Usually involves parents who live some distance apart, but close enough to facilitate rotating weekends. 12% basic child support credit. 
• Every-Other Weekend (F-Su) & One Evening Per Week: The old "standby," with children returning each weeknight to the primarily custodian's residence. 12% basic child support credit.
• Every-Other Weekend (F-Su) & One Overnights Per Week: Many judges afford overnight visits during the school week. 12% basic child support credit. 
• Every-Other Weekend (F-Su) & Two Evenings Per Week: Slight increase from the "old standby," but still no overnights during the school week. 12% basic child support credit
• Every-Other Weekend (F-Su) & Two Overnights Per Week: 6 of 14 overnights. Probably lands in the "joint physical" label about 50% of the time. 12% basic child support credit, with possibility of increase by judge, but not to 50%.
• Every-Other Weekend (F-M) : Minimal involved schedule includes time until Monday morning school drop off. 12% basic child support credit.
• Every-Other Weekend (F-M) & One Evening Per Week: One additional overnight e/o Sunday, but still a 12% basic child support credit.
• Every-Other Weekend (F-M) & One Overnight Per Week: 5/14 overnights. 12% basic child support credit.
• Every-Other Weekend (F-M) & Two Evenings Per Week: Argument could be made that this borders on 45% of the time, without actual overnights. 12% basic support credit.

Typical Joint Physical Schedules (Equal Time): A 50% basic child support credit is afforded against basic support, as time exceeds 45% of available time.

• Week On/Week Off: Easiest equal access schedule to follow, but some don't appreciate a full week without seeing children. 50% credit.
• Six & One (Overnight): Basically week on/week off, with a day in the middle to see the children. 50% credit. 
• Six & One (Evening) : Same as above, except no overnight during the other parent's week. 50% credit. 
• Two-Two-Three-Three: Schedule rotates M/T then W/TH, the F, S, S, then starts over, but parent who didn't have on weekend has M/T. 50% credit. 
• Two-Two-Five-Five: Concrete every M/T with one parent, every W/TH with the other, then rotate F/S/S. Each parent has two days, followed by five days, with the children. 50% credit.

Galbraith writes:

It teaches kids what happens when their parents separate in an entertaining, online way. The tour says "A walk through Changeville will tell you what to expect and help you deal with all the different feelings you might have and along the way there's all kinds of fun games and activities!"

Legal words and how kids are looked after is explained on Legal Street. On Break Up Street, kids learn what can happen during the process when their parents are going through rough times. There also is a section where kids can create some art.

What a great tool for kids.

Nothing but respect for Galbraith. Appreciate the creativity behind the crafters of Changeville. But, after a stumble down "breakup street" in a "fun online world," I found it strange to type in my feelings about being in the "messenger trap." Kind of like a visit to Epcot Center, and taking a ride on the "The Story of Meat." Something just seems out of place.

Am I off base? Anyone try it and love it?

I represent a client with similar issues. The kids are angry with mom about the fact that she had (and is having) an affair with the man across the street. The kids have demanded that she stop seeing him, but mom refuses, citing "adult privilege." It hasn't been pretty, but my client has struggled with what he should do to encourage on ongoing relationship between the kids and mom.

According to Brette McWhorter Sember, author of How to Parent with Your Ex:

The first thing to remember is that while it's always important to listen to your child's feelings and opinions, spending time with the nonresidential parent is not optional.

Your child doesn't get to pick and choose when she is going to go or what circumstances will gain his approval. There are days when kids don't want to go to school, but you don't let your child stay home on those days. Similarly, you can't let your child decide to just skip visitation.

Visitation is more than just a schedule. It is a connection to both parents. And continuing to have a connection with both parents is absolutely essential for your child.

Children are not in charge of visitation. Parents are. Children's opinions are important, but not decisive. Children are not old enough or mature enough to hold the authority to decide when and if visitation happens. If you give your child that authority you will confuse and overwhelm him. Your child wants and needs to know that both parents are an unconditional part of his or her life.

If your child is a teen, she may need more control over visitation than younger children are allowed, however this does not mean that she can write the other parent out of her life. Teens need to feel some control over their lives, and need time for school, jobs, friends, and activities, but they also do desperately need real connections with both parents.

It is upsetting for everyone involved when a child refuses to go on visitation, but if both parents insist together that there is no choice, then no one will be the villain and your child will have to cope with the reality of the situation.
 

In cases where there is an extended period of disassociation, reunification therapy may be the only option that will work. You can learn more about this process through Mary Ann Aronsohn's post on Parental Reunification Therapy.

In my opinion, clients find themselves in dangerous territory when children refuse to spend time with the other parent. They can't win.

If they force the parenting time, the kids may do the same thing to them, or run away, or hurt themselves - they often claim. Sounds silly, but I've had a judge issue a decision based upon a young teen's threat to run away if she didn't get her way. With due respect, probably not the right basis to make a custody determination, but my point is that these types of threats may be treated seriously by the judge.

If they don't force the time, the other parent can easily argue that they enabled parental alienation, which may provide a basis for the court to sanction the "innocent" parent by denying custody.

Personally, any parent who simply puts their hands in the air and says "I don't know what to do" better figure out a solution...fast. Professionals are here to help. The "I tried" argument doesn't usually stick with the Court. It boils down to the fact that kids are kids and don't rule the roost. Judges expect a certain level of "parenting," which includes getting children to do the things they don't want to - like dishes, homework, and, sometimes, spending time with the other parent.

Ruling against a divorced father's wish that his daughter help him celebrate his birthday, a judge in Morristown Thursday said the child should have the rare chance to spend that time as a bridesmaid at her godmother's wedding.

Mother Cortney Hooper of Dover took her ex-husband, Steven Miller, to Superior Court to have a judge decide how their 10-year-old daughter should spend Friday night, even though it encroaches on Miller's visitation time.

Though Miller and his lawyer, Jamie Berger, argued that this weekend belonged to Miller and that his family planned a Friday night celebration for his 35th birthday, Superior Court Judge Mary Gibbons Whipple said she believed the little girl should have the experience of wearing a special dress and shoes and eating the cake and hearing wedding music.

 Saying she didn't mean to diminish the importance of a child celebrating a birthday with a party, Whipple nonetheless said the wedding experience — and accompanying her bridesmaid mother down the aisle — would be unforgettable for a little girl.

Addressing Miller directly, the judge asked: "Do you really want to say 'no dress, no cake, no wedding, no bridesmaid, no band? You have to go to my birthday party.' Do you really want to take that away from her?"

Miller said he hadn't asked his daughter her preference, but that his time with her is precious and his family will be heartbroken that she won't be present at his party. Miller did get to see his daughter on his actual birthday, April 7, but the party was planned for Friday.

"A birthday party happens every year. A wedding is once-in-a-lifetime," Whipple said.

Read Solotoff's post here. Find the full article cited by Solotoff here. The more entertaining part of this are the comments read by paper readers. Find them here.

What do you think?

Appears to me neither the mother, nor the father, hold all the blame. The lawyers representing them at the time of the divorce should have put language in their divorce decree to cover such a situation - especially if, as it seems, it was a high conflict case.

In the cases we handle, we include specific provisions relating to special days (such as holidays, birthdays and family events) that a child may experience. We also build in a hierarchy so there is no question about whose parenting time trumps whose. For example, "life events," such as a wedding or funeral, take priority over birthdays. Birthdays and holidays take priority over vacation time. Vacation time takes priority over routine access time. Cut and dry.

Of course, the pessimist will ask, "What if you have a funeral and a wedding on the day?" Our clients typically agree to language that requires them to defer to a parenting time expeditor. A parenting time expeditor is a neutral professional who is given authority by the court, and parties, to make parenting time decisions that are consistent with a divorce decree. If either party dislikes the decision, they have a right to appeal to the district court.

The Minnesota statute concerning the appointment of a parenting time expeditor may be found here.

Here are some key things to keep in mind about parenting time expeditors:

• Parenting time expeditors are not required to be utilized, but courts strongly encourage them.
• The benefits in using a parenting time expeditor include prompt attention to a particular conflict (immediate, instead of six weeks, or more, to see a judge) and the avoidance of attorney's fees and court costs.
• Parenting time expeditors are usually an experienced matrimonial lawyer or former social worker or custody evaluator.
• The parties usually split the cost associated with the expeditor, and give the expeditor the authority to allocate costs based upon the reasonableness of the parties to a particular dispute.
• Parenting time expeditors have their own special retainer agreements and will often require a retainer fee placed into a trust account in order to render services.

Even if the parties haven't agreed to use a parenting time expeditor, or have agreed but haven't named one in their divorce decree, some of the best expeditors our clients have worked with include: Kim Brandell, Andrea Niemi, Carol Vander Kooi and Elizabeth Shading. Each have a little different style and are worth considering.

In examining the best interests of a child, the Court will examine 13 criteria, including:

• The wishes of the child's parent or parents as to custody;
• The reasonable preference of the child as to custody, if the court deems the child to be of sufficient age to express preference;
• The child's primary caretaker;
• The intimacy of the relationship between each parent and the child;
• The interaction and interrelationship of the child with a parent or parents, siblings, and any other person who may significantly affect the child's best interests;
• The child's adjustment to home, school, and community;
• The length of time the child has lived in a stable, satisfactory environment and the desirability of maintaining continuity;
• The permanence, as a family unit, of the existing or proposed custodial home;
• The mental and physical health of all individuals involved; except that a disability of a proposed custodian or the child shall not be determinative of the custody of the child, unless the proposed custody arrangement is not in the best interest of the child;
• The capacity and disposition of the parties to give the child love, affection, and guidance, and to continue educating and raising the child in the child's culture and religion or creed, if any;
• The child's cultural background;
• The effect on the child of the actions of an abuser, if related to domestic abuse that has occurred between the parents or between a parent and another individual, whether or not the individual alleged to have committed domestic abuse is or ever was a family or household member of the parent; and
• The disposition of each parent to encourage and permit frequent and continuing contact by the other parent with the child.

Legal custody grants a parent the right to have a role in the educational, medical and religious decisions made on behalf of a child. There is a presumption in Minnesota that parents should be granted joint legal custody. This presumption may be overcome, however, by demonstrating that such an award does not serve the best interests of a child (if, for example, a parent experiences significant mental illness or has played no role in the life of a child).

Physical custody refers to the day to day physical location of children. The presumption in Minnesota is that one parent should have sole physical custody and the other should be awarded an appropriate amount of parenting time with the children. This presumption may be overcome, however, by demonstrating that such an award does not serve the best interests of a child - usually by showing that the parents have each played a significant role in a child's upbringing, get along relatively well, communicate respectfully with one another, have no history of domestic abuse and intend to remain living in close proximity (within the same school district) of one another. Some judges are much more open to an award of joint physical custody than others.

If one parent is awarded sole physical custody of a child, the other will typically receive an award of parenting time. Very often, such an award involves spending time with the children every-other weekend, one or two evenings per week, half of all holidays and non-school days during the academic year, and a number of weeks of uninterrupted vacation time during the summer months.

A lot of fanfare, but stick with me.

The parties have divorced. Mom lives in Minneapolis while dad has relocated to Anoka. They agree to share transportation, but neither wants to drive more than the other. The answer rests at Meetways.com.

Meetways was established in August 2008 to help people easily find a halfway point between two locations. According to their website, they wanted to find a way that friends, colleagues, and business associates could quickly and conveniently find a place to meet between their locations. Divorce lawyers have found a great use for it too.

Free of charge and way too easy to use (just type in the respective addresses and it gives you a midpoint), check out Meetways.com if you must know precisely where to "meet in the middle."

Sources for this post: Alaska Divorce Blog, Georgia Family Law Blog and the California Divorce Blawg.

Attorney Robert Mues notes that there are a number of different factors and circumstances that have an effect on the determination of custody. As in Ohio, Minnesota judges must consider a number of relevant factors when determining the best interest of a child. One of those factors includes whether either parent has continuously and willfully denied the other parent’s right to parenting time or visitation as ordered by a court.

While visitation denials may be relatively easy to prove in court, that alone doesn’t amount to parental alienation. It is not uncommon for some amount of alienation to occur when parents first separate. Usually, the alienation subsides after the parents’ transition through the separation and move on with their lives. In some cases it doesn’t, and instead it continues and escalates to what has become referred to as “Parental Alienation Syndrome.”

This disorder was first identified by Richard A. Gardner, a forensic psychiatrist in the mid-1980s, who defines it as:

Mues accurately points out that there are three stages of parental alienation syndrome. These stages include mild, moderate and severe. In a mild case there are naive alienators and the perpetrator can be educated and changed. However, in a severe case the perpetrator is often delusional and their entire being is focused on destroying the other parent’s relationship with the child. Experts must be brought in to prove the alienation and, more importantly, to assist the child in gaining an accurate perspective on things.

Having handled many custody disputes involving parental alienation syndrome, I can honestly say that they are, by far, the most difficult and raw of all family cases. At the end of the day, the parent who engages in parental alienation behaviors is committing an act of abuse upon a child. The caselaw in Minnesota on this issue is rather undeveloped. But, like so many psychological theories and concepts, the public, and the courts, are becoming much more familiar with the syndrome and consequence of parental alienation.

There are some experts and jurists who have criticized the concept of parental alienation syndrome, calling it "inadmissible junk science." This author, however, questions how many times they've actually experienced and dealt with the conduct described by Gardner. Parental alienation syndrome is very real (no matter what you call it) and is an example of a parenting at its lowest and most neglectful level.

Here are a few ways to discredit the custody evaluator at trial:

1. Bias. In personal injury cases, the insurance company will hire a doctor to examine the injured. Insurers pay thousands of dollars (now you know where your premiums go) to certain doctors who are prone to rendering an opinion favorable to the insurance company. These "independent" experts are often discredited by the plaintiff's lawyer bringing out the hundreds of prior opinions these physicians have rendered against injury victims. The same holds true in family court. Most custody evaluators have years of experience and have rendered hundreds of opinions. If there is consistency in those opinions, they carry a bias. Certain experts are prone to rendering certain opinions. Make the court aware of the bias of the evaluator and the recommendations may be discredited.
2. Diligence. We've cross-examined custody evaluators who have spent less than an hour in the presence of our client and the children that are the subject of the action. How much can anyone learn about a familial situation in 60 minutes of observation. What if the kids were having a tough day? What if the parent is nervous about the scrutiny of the evaluator? What if the dog won't stop barking? Think of it as a movie. If someone stopped "Titanic" before the ice berg and never watched the ending, they'd think everyone arrived safely in New York and wouldn't know the whole story. Evaluators are busy people. That haste can be taken advantage of.
3. Qualifications. Just who is the evaluator in your case? Do they have Ph.D.? How many evaluations have they conducted? Who are they employed by? What is their degree in? Have they been subject to an action for malpractice or ethics complaints? Disciplined by a professional board? Are they a licensed psychologist? All of these questions go to the foundation of the expert's opinions. Get them disqualified as an expert and the court cannot rely on their recommendations.

These same techniques can be used to discredit other court-appointed custody experts, such as a Guardian Ad Litem. No kidding - we had case in which the adverse Guardian had a degree in art history and failed to spend a single moment with our client in the presence of our client with the children (despite a statutory requirement that she meet with the parent in the presence of the children in the relevant home). We attacked her opinions on all three of the grounds referenced above.  

A parenting consultant is part mediator and part arbitrator. They can listen to parents and facilitate discussion, but also possess decision-making authority. Most are experienced family practitioners or child psychologists who work primarily in the area of parenting dispute resolution.

Parenting consultants offer the following benefits:

• Good decisions;
• Fast decisions; and
• Cheap decisions.

Most parties agree to employ a parenting consultant as part of their divorce decree and appreciate the ability to turn to someone with decision-making power with a simple phone call (try doing that with a judge) in the absence of ongoing legal fees. Most agree that the decision of the consultant is binding and may only be modified with an appeal to the court within 14 days from the decision. Parties typically split the cost of the consultant.

A divorce can be a painful and difficult experience, but if you understand the functions and limitations of the legal system, the process becomes less frustrating. It is our hope, as Judges of Family Court, that this pamphlet will give you a better understanding of the process, and help you get through your divorce with realistic ideas and goals.

Minnesota’s divorce system is based on the principle of “no-fault,” meaning that a dissolution will be granted if either party believes that the marriage is over. Generally the causes of the failure of the marriage are not an issue in court. All that matters is that the marriage needs to be ended.
It is impossible for us to heal the emotional wounds created by your divorce. You must understand that the legal system is not a tool for punishment of your spouse. The courtroom isn't the place for revenge. We must decide your case on the basis of unique facts. In most cases, the law does not permit us to compensate either of you for the other’s misconduct.

Settlement

The best way to conclude your case is to settle it. Through compromise and cooperation, a settlement can lead to greater mutual satisfaction and lessened animosity between you and your spouse. In most cases, negotiations toward settlement can be more productive and far less expensive than trial. If negotiations fail and you must try your case, we will make rulings that will permanently affect you and your children. Our rulings must be made exclusively upon the limited evidence that is presented in court, and nothing else. Because we are restricted in what we can and cannot do, a settlement can offer a wider range of options. Ask the court administrator for information about mediation programs. A mediator is a neutral person trained to help you and your spouse reach a settlement.

Variations

Every dissolution is different. Your results may be very different from your neighbor’s, friend’s, or relative’s. You cannot rely upon what happened in their cases and assume that your results will be the same. Cases that seem similar may, in fact, be very different and will be treated differently under the law. For this reason, you should look to your lawyer for your legal advice and information. Your friends and relatives usually do not have a grasp of the law and your case, and accepting their advice may hinder you in the long run.

Finances

In the marriage dissolution, the income, assets and debts accumulated during the marriage must be allocated between you and your spouse. The law is that you and your spouse are financial partners during the marriage and are presumed entitled to share in both the assets and income the partnership made. You must make a full disclosure of your finances. For most people, life-styles change after a divorce. Since divorces do not create property or income, we must divide the marital resources between two separate households. It costs more to run two households than one. If you or your spouse have not been employed during the marriage, it may be necessary to seek employment. In considering a settlement, you should consider whether you can afford the attorney’s fees to fully litigate your case. Fees and costs in contested cases can be quite high. Usually, a settlement prior to trial reduces the expenses considerably, an important consideration if you come to the divorce with limited resources.

Issues

Dissolutions generally involve four major issues: child custody and parenting time, child support, spousal maintenance and a division of property and debts. After the case is concluded, we may later be asked to modify custody, parenting time or support. You need to understand each of these aspects of your case.

Child Custody

Both parents and their children may be required to attend an education program before the dissolution is granted. The program will help you understand what affect divorce has on children, and how you can make the transition less traumatic for them. Remember, your marriage may be ending, but you will always be parents to your children. Most parents will share parental responsibility for their children after the dissolution. In doing so, you must communicate and confer with each other in making decisions that will affect your children.

Usually, we will give one parent primary residential care (custody) of the children. Unless there is a good reason to limit parenting time, we will grant the other parent frequent parenting time. We decide custody solely on what is best for the children. Often, one of the parties is hurt by our decision, especially if that party sees the decision in a "win/lose" light. In truth, there can be no loser if the children’s welfare is protected.

In virtually all custody contests we will direct both parties to participate in mediation to resolve that issue. A mediator is an unbiased third party who can often assist the parties in reaching agreement upon what is best for the children. An agreement on custody will certainly make your case easier and help your children immeasurably in dealing with your divorce. If domestic violence has occurred, the Court cannot require you to participate in mediation.

If an agreement regarding parenting time is not reached, a custody study may be ordered, with costs assessed to the parties.

In cases where child abuse or neglect is alleged by a parent during a dissolution, we must appoint a guardian ad litem (GAL) to represent the best interests of the child with respect to custody, support and parenting time. A GAL may also be appointed if the court believes the conflict in the case presents a potential hazard to the child’s welfare or the child’s interests are not being adequately served. The GAL is to conduct an independent investigation into what would be best for the child and to advocate for the child’s best interests. GAL’s must maintain confidentiality of information, monitor the child’s best interest throughout the proceedings, and present written reports to the court on the child’s best interests. If a GAL is appointed, you are likely to be assessed a fee for their services.

Child Support

Aside from continuing to love your children and seeing them often, you have no higher obligation as a parent than to continue supporting your children after the divorce. Child support is more important than any other debt or financial obligation. Both parents are required to support the children but the non-residential parent will be directed to pay his/her portion of the support to the other. This does not mean that the residential parent is not contributing to the support.
Minnesota has adopted guidelines for child support that we are required to follow. Your friends and relatives may have been involved in divorces years ago or in other states and receive or pay higher or lower support than our guidelines provide. The child support in your case will be based upon the incomes of both parents and the needs of your children under the guidelines established by the State. It is possible to deviate from the guideline amount but you must prove that the deviation is legally justifiable.

Spousal Maintenance

We find it necessary to award spousal support in some cases. As with child support, we will consider two factors: one party’s need and the other’s ability to pay. Both of these factors must be proven in court by the requesting spouse. Spousal support may be awarded to either a husband or wife and, depending on the length of the marriage and other factors, the spousal support may be permanent or for only a short duration.

Property Division

Under Minnesota law, we must try to make a “fair and equitable distribution” of marital property and debts. “Equitable” does not always mean “equal.” Many factors, including child support, custody and spousal support awards, can cause us to make an unequal (but still equitable) division of property. We will not generally divide the property and debts that arise outside the marriage.

Attorney’s Fees

We can order one party to pay some or all of the other’s attorney’s fees. We do this to assure that both parties have equal access to competent counsel. We do not award fees in every case, we must first find that one party has a greater ability to pay than the other does.
You cannot ever be certain that we will award fees. For this reason, and because of the great drain that fees can be on marital assets, everyone (parties and attorneys alike) should make every effort to resolve a dissolution case as economically as possible.

Do Not Write Letters To Your Judge

We are not permitted to read letters containing facts or allegations about your case, nor can we speak with you or your friends/relatives on the telephone. If there is something we need to know, inform us by scheduling a hearing and filing motion papers.

Have Reasonable Expectations

You will certainly be disappointed if you expect to “win” on every issue. Rarely is either party happy about every ruling in a case. Even the best rulings leave both parties somewhat dissatisfied. Encourage your attorney to give you a realistic projection of the outcome of your case.

Keep Communication Open With Your Spouse/ Former Spouse

As long as children are involved, you and your former spouse will have to work together. Your children will suffer to the degree that you and your former spouse cannot communicate or cooperate.

Get Professional Help To Deal With Your Emotions

Please do your best to keep emotions out of the case. Your feelings of anger, pain, and betrayal are understandable, but expressing them inappropriately in court may interfere with your ability to provide us with the information we need. If you have trouble with the hostility, anger, or depression that often occurs in divorces, don’t hesitate to get counseling to help you through it. A good counselor can help you, and your children, get through this difficult time and avoid having the anger become counterproductive.

Encourage and Support Parenting Time (Visitation)

If you are the custodial parent and the court has ordered parenting time between your children and your ex-spouse, you have a duty to encourage parenting time. You must do more than just stay out of the way or leave the choice to the children. Encourage your children to see your former spouse frequently and to enjoy the contact. Never use support or parenting time as a lever or bargaining chip in dealing with the other parent. However, if mental health, chemical dependency, abuse or other issues arise and you think your children are not safe with your ex-spouse, seek professional advice on what to do.

Give Your Children a Chance

The way you and your spouse handle your divorce will have an enormous impact upon your children. If you argue and fight, their problems and pain will be magnified. By acting reasonably, you can help your children through one of the most difficult events of their lives.
 

The most common expert we employ is a home appraiser. In most cases the most valuable asset for division is the marital homestead. If one party elects to remain in the homestead we must calculate the equity in the house to determine the value of the property settlement. Naturally, the first step to establishing equity involves the determination of the market value of the property.

A typical homestead appraisal costs around $350. They take approximately one (1) week to complete. Many clients ask if a realtor’s market analysis can substitute for an appraisal. If the parties agree, a market analysis is sufficient. However, a realtor’s market analysis does not hold the same evidentiary weight as a certified real estate appraisal. For that reason, the appraisal is usually preferred.

Suppose you are 40 years of age and your union pension indicates that at present you qualify to receive $1,000 per month at age 55. Those benefits, despite the fact they are not yet realized, have an economic value. It is the job of an actuary to calculate that value. Clients are often shocked to realize that their pension interest, in terms of present dollars, totals several hundred thousand dollars.

If the pension interest was accumulated during the marriage, it is subject to equal division. This may be done by a cash off-set or an award of future benefits to each party. If the cash buy-out is contemplated, then we must know the present value of the benefit. An actuary typically charges a couple hundred dollars for their services.

If custody is a contested issue in your case, a custody evaluator will be appointed by the court. This individual typically possesses a degree in psychology or social work. The custody evaluator will meet with each party individually, and meet with them in the presence of the children. They will gather documentation such as medical and school records involving the children. Custody experts often speak with counselors that might be involved with the family. Parents will often refer the evaluator to several acquaintances who can speak of their ability to affectively parent the children.

The process of completing a custody evaluation typically takes several months. Once all of the necessary information is gathered by the evaluator, a report is generated that addresses the information gathered in relation to the standard for an award of custody in Minnesota – the best interest of the child. These reports are often twenty (20) or thirty (30) pages in length and may include painstaking detail about the family situation. The final part of the evaluator’s report includes a series of recommendations. Most often, the court will adopt the recommendations of the evaluator.

There are two types of custody evaluators in Minnesota: court appointed and privately retained. There is no legal distinction between the two, but a private evaluator will typically charge more than $10,000 for their services. In some situations, a private custody evaluation will be done much more quickly than an evaluation conducted by court services. If court services performs the evaluation they, too, charge a fee. But it is typically much less than the fee associated with a private evaluation. 

We frequently employ business appraisers to ascertain the present value of a business owned by one or both of the parties to a divorce. There are a number of ways that a business appraiser calculates the market value of a particular business. The evaluator will look at the overall business revenue, profits, assets and marketability of the business.

The cost for a particular appraisal varies depending upon the nature of the business being valued. In most situations, a business appraisal will cost between $5,000 and $10,000. Once the appraisal is concluded, the evaluator will present a written report. The report will include the various formulas utilized for determining market value and offer an expert opinion concerning the value of the business based upon dozens of factors that have been taken into account.

In cases involving spousal maintenance, we often employ a vocational assessor. This individual is asked to evaluate a spouse’s capacity for employment and potential annual earnings based upon their educational background, skills and the market place. The person being evaluated will be asked to spend the day with the vocational assessor. An interview takes place and the individual is asked to complete a series of psychological tests, including the MMPI and other skills tests.

Once the evaluator has opportunity to get to know the individual, they will generate a report that discusses the skills and abilities of the individual, along with a host of potential careers that are available to them. The assessor we retain will take into account market conditions specific to the Minneapolis area. A vocational assessment typically costs approximately $1,500. The conclusions drawn by the assessor provide significant evidence for the court to consider in light of a request for spousal maintenance.

The foregoing experts are the most frequently retained individuals to assist our clients through the divorce process. Certainly there are others, such as vehicle appraisers, psychological experts, chemical abuse experts, accountants and others. The costs associated with retaining many experts is substantial. For that reason, we work very closely with our clients to balance the costs of the involvement of an expert against the benefit that we hope to realize in retaining that individual.
 

Our argument to the court was that the grandparents had “stepped into the shoes” of the father, who was an admitted alcoholic. Despite the fact that the grandparents had spent substantial amounts of time with their grandkids, mom and dad disputed their continued involvement in the lives of the children and wanted all time spent with the grandparents to be supervised.

Our clients were awarded one full weekend a month with the grandkids and additional time to take their grandchildren on vacation. None of the time was required to be supervised. This award was quite substantial, given the fact that most non-custodial parents are typically ordered to receive two weekends per month of parenting time, along with one weekday evening. The court clearly recognized that the stability of the children was critical in this case and that this ongoing relationship served their best interests.

Marriage dissolution petition. A petition for dissolution of marriage or legal separation must allege whether an OFP that governs the parties or a party and a minor child of the parties is in effect and, if so, the district court or similar jurisdiction in which it was entered.

Custody disputes. In a proceeding where two or more parties seek custody of a child, the court must consider and evaluate all relevant factors in determining the best interests of the child. One of the relevant factors set forth in Minnesota law is the effect on the child of the actions of abuse that has occurred between the parents or the parties. When joint legal or physical custody is contemplated, the court must consider whether domestic abuse has occurred between the parents. If domestic abuse has occurred between the parents, the court must apply a rebuttable presumption that joint legal or physical custody is not in the best interests of the child.

Parenting plan. Upon the request of both parents, a parenting plan may be created in lieu of an order for child custody. A parenting plan must include a schedule of time each parent spends with the child, a designation of decision-making responsibilities, and a method of dispute resolution. The court may not require a parenting plan that provides for joint legal custody or the use of dispute resolution processes (other than the judicial process) if the court finds that either parent has engaged in acts of domestic abuse or child abuse. In determining custody, a court must consider a finding under the Domestic Abuse Act or under a similar law of another state that domestic abuse has occurred between the parties.

Parenting time. Upon the request of either parent, the court must grant parenting time on behalf of the child and parent to enable them to maintain a parent-child relationship that will be in the best interests of the child. If the court finds, however, after a hearing, that parenting time is likely to endanger the child’s physical or emotional health or impair the child’s emotional development, the court must restrict parenting time and may deny parenting time entirely, if the circumstances warrant. If a parent requests supervised parenting time and an OFP is in effect, the judge or judicial officer must consider the OFP in making a decision regarding parenting time.

Modification of parenting time. If a parent specifically alleges that parenting time places the parent or child in danger of harm, the court must hold a hearing at the earliest possible time to determine the need to modify the order granting parenting time. The court must modify an order granting or denying parenting time whenever modification would serve the best interests of the child. Parenting time may not be restricted unless the parenting time is likely to endanger the child’s physical or emotional health or impair the child’s emotional development or the parent has chronically and unreasonably failed to comply with court-ordered parenting time.

Additional parenting time to provide child care. The court may allow additional parenting time to provide child care while the other parent is working, subject to reasonableness and the best interests of the child. In making this determination, the court must consider whether domestic abuse has occurred between the parties.

Move to another state. If a parenting-time order is in effect, the court must look at the effect of domestic abuse on the safety and welfare of the child and the parent when considering a request from a parent to move a child to another state. The burden of proof is upon the parent requesting the move, except that if the court finds that the person requesting the move is a victim of domestic violence, the burden of proof is on the parent opposing the move.

Custody and parenting time of children to unmarried persons. A proceeding by a father whose paternity has been recognized under Minnesota law to petition for rights of parenting time or custody may not be combined with a proceeding under the Domestic Abuse Act. Also, a petition by certain other individuals (e.g., grandparents or a person with whom a child has resided) for visitation rights may not be combined with a proceeding under the Domestic Abuse Act.

Participation in a parenting plan when a person is convicted of certain offenses. If a person seeking child custody or parenting time has been convicted of an applicable crime, the person seeking custody or parenting time has the burden to prove that custody or parenting time is in the best interests of the child. This provision applies if the conviction occurred within the preceding five years; the person currently is incarcerated, on probation or under supervised release for the offense; or the victim of the crime was a family or household member. In these cases, the court may not grant custody or parenting time to the person unless it finds that the custody or parenting time is in the best interests of the child. Also, if a person who has court-ordered custody of a child or parenting-time rights is convicted of an applicable crime and no action is pending regarding custody or parenting time, the sentencing court must refer the matter to the appropriate family court or action. The family court must:

• Grant temporary custody to the noncustodial parent, unless it finds that another custody arrangement is in the best interests of the child; or
• Suspend parenting-time rights, unless it finds that parenting time with the convicted person is in the best interests of the child.

Proceedings under this law must be expedited. The defendant has the burden of proving that continued custody or parenting time is in the best interests of the child. If the victim of the crime as a family or household member, the standard of proof is clear and convincing evidence.

Temporary orders and restraining orders. A temporary order in a proceeding brought for custody, dissolution, legal separation, or related matters may not vacate or modify an order granted under the Domestic Abuse Act restraining an abusing party from committing acts of domestic abuse. Upon proper motion the court may, however, hear a motion for modification of an OFP concurrently with a proceeding for dissolution of marriage.

Guardian ad litem. In all child custody, marriage dissolution, or legal separation proceedings in which custody or parenting time of a minor child is an issue, the court must appoint a guardian ad litem if the court has reason to believe that the minor child is a victim of domestic child abuse or neglect. The guardian ad litem must represent the interests of the child and provide advice to the  court on custody and parenting time.

• Restrain the abusing party from committing acts of domestic abuse;
• Exclude the abusing party from the dwelling which the parties share or from the residence of the petitioner;
• Exclude the abusing party from a reasonable area surrounding the dwelling or residences
• Award temporary custody or establish temporary visitation with regard to minor children of the parties on a basis which gives primary consideration to the safety of the victim and the children;
• Establish temporary support for minor children or a spouse and order the withholding of support from the income of the person obligated to pay the support;
• Upon request of the petitioner, provide counseling or other social services for the parties, if married, or if there are minor children;
• Order the abusing party to participate in treatment or counseling services;
• Award temporary use and possession of property and make other orders regarding property;
• Exclude the abusing party from the place of employment of the petitioner or otherwise limit the abusing party’s access to the petitioner at the petitioner’s place of employment;
• Order the abusing party to pay restitution to the petitioner;
• Order the continuance of all currently available insurance coverage without change in coverage or beneficiary designation; or
• Order, in its discretion, other relief it deems necessary for the protection of a family or household member, including orders or directives to the sheriff or constable.

Relief that is granted by the order is for a fixed period of time, not to exceed one year, except when the court determines a longer fixed period is appropriate.

Keep Communication Open With Your Spouse/ Former Spouse. As long as children are involved, you and your former spouse will have to work together. Your children will suffer to the degree that you and your former spouse cannot communicate or cooperate.

Get Professional Help To Deal With Your Emotions. Please do your best to keep emotions out of the case. Your feelings of anger, pain, and betrayal are understandable, but expressing them inappropriately in court may interfere with your ability to provide a judge with the information they need. If you have trouble with the hostility, anger, or depression that often occurs in divorces, don’t hesitate to get counseling to help you through it. A good counselor can help you, and your children, get through this difficult time and avoid having the anger become counterproductive.

Encourage and Support Parenting Time. If you are the custodial parent and the court has ordered parenting time between your children and your ex-spouse, you have a duty to encourage parenting time. You must do more than just stay out of the way or leave the choice to the children. Encourage your children to see your former spouse frequently and to enjoy the contact. Never use support or parenting time as a lever or bargaining chip in dealing with the other parent. However, if mental health, chemical dependency, abuse or other issues arise and you think your children are not safe with your ex-spouse, seek professional advice on what to do.

Give Your Children a Chance. The way you and your spouse handle your divorce will have an enormous impact upon your children. If you argue and fight, their problems and pain will be magnified. By acting reasonably, you can help your children through one of the most difficult events of their lives.