Minneapolis Divorce Attorney & Lawyer : Minnesota Family Law Firm : Brown Law Offices : St. Paul, Twin Cities MN Custody Child Support

Whether you decide to contact our firm or speak with another attorney, you should probably speak with a divorce lawyer about your situation before utilizing the various free online divorce forms that are scattered across the internet. My suggestion is in line with every district court judge I have encountered.

As an attorney, you can imagine I find myself in the courtroom quite often. Nearly every time I’m in court, I sit through cases in which the parties are attempting to divorce themselves without the assistance of a lawyer using legal forms they downloaded from the internet. The vast majority of these couples are turned away by the court for a failure to comply with the various legal requirements that must be satisfied in order for the court to accept their written submissions. Frustrated, having missed work for a second or third time, and getting no legal advice from the court, individuals that initially hoped to conclude their uncontested divorce without a lot of trouble find themselves extremely frustrated.

I am very open and honest with individuals I meet with who ask me whether they really need us to be involved in their undisputed case. My answer is always “Yes,” but with a rationale explanation.

Nothing we do as attorneys amounts to rocket science. I tell folks that I know nothing about engines. Certainly, I can take the time to find my Toyota manual and dig through it for step-by-step guidance on how to change the oil in my car. But, I would be left to wonder every time I turned on the key whether I did so appropriately. It is important to make sure that the oil is changed correctly. The results of doing so incorrectly can result in serious disaster. Personally, I would rather spend a few bucks and know that the job was done correctly the first time and that someone is there to make sure that if there is a problem it can be immediately addressed.

The same logic holds true in court - on a much larger scale. An attorney can make sure that all of the issues involved in your case are addressed in an appropriate manner. All of the "magic language" that the court is looking for will be included in the relevant documentation. Creative solutions can be offered to potential road blocks that you and your spouse may face. And, if a judge has trouble with the agreement you have submitted or the order you want the court to sign, a lawyer can fix it without incident.

As I mentioned earlier, our work in this area is not rocket science. But, it is serious enough to warrant the involvement of someone who can make sure that it is done promptly, efficiently and, most importantly, correctly. The adage is, indeed, true: You get what you pay for. Due diligence in hiring an attorney to assist you will help you avoid the countless traps that you will have to avoid in order to successfully bring your divorce to a conclusion.

• Print
• Comments
• Trackbacks

Every person going through divorce will face one fundamental decision time and again: Do I compromise or do I stand firm in my position? Certainly there are times for both. As often as possible, however, we recommend taking the high road and giving a little of yourself for the greater good of your family. This may not seem like good advice coming from a divorce lawyer. After all, isn’t it our job to stand and fight to the bitter end with sharp claws and gnashing teeth (have you seen those silly attorney yellow pages ads yet...the ones with growling grizzly bears and wolves featured prominantly)? Each case requires a little different approach.

At this point in time, compromising probably doesn't seem like the best thing to do for yourself. Nor is it the best for your lawyer's pocketbook. But, a lawyer who truly has your interests in mind will attempt to position your case for settlement and speak with you about how to approach a case in a sensible manner rather than unnecessarily drive up the costs of your case through contentious litigation. We often say that any fool (referencing the attorney) can turn a $3,000 case into a $30,000 case. Aggressive lawyering typically yields greater fees and much of the time it simply isn't necessary. 

Unfortunately, in some cases we can do nothing but litigate. We've been there many times and enjoy trying cases. This entry is not intended for parties who have been victims of severe domestic violence or whose children are in danger while in the care of their other parent. In those situations, and others, we must take a very aggressive approach. However, the vast majority of cases do not involve such situations and can be resolved much less expensively (in terms of dollars, time and emotions) in a manner that is consistent with what the court will ultimately do with the case if asked to decide. 

Consider how your soon-to-be-ex feels about things. Think about your children. Discuss solutions that work for everyone involved in the case, not just you. Most importantly, it is irresponsible to intentionally create or fuel ongoing conflict during a divorce. In our experience, clients who are bitter, angry and relentless in their approach wind up hurting themselves and living with much more pain than those who come to the table with a sense of flexibility and reasonableness. We find they are also far less satisfied with the legal process.

We are not suggesting the divorce process will be easy for you. Everyone knows that it is very difficult to make reasoned decisions in the middle of an emotionally charged situation. It is our job to help with that. We understand you may hurt because of infidelity, irresponsible spending on the part of your spouse or chemical dependency issues. But, the bottom line is that the court does not care about such things, unless they have a direct impact on the welfare of the children. For that reason, it is important to focus on the things that do matter to the ultimate decision-maker in your case.

We find the couples who resolve their case through settlement feel much better about the result. They own the agreement. They haven't been told what they are going to do some person in a black robe. They conclude their case in a much shorter time frame than expected. They have more financial resources to draw on in the future. And, most importantly, their children seem to benefit from the fact that their parents, despite the dissolution, have found a way to work things out. The experts agree that divorce is a very stressful and difficult time for the litigants. But, those same experts also agree that it is even more stressful and painful for children. The longer your case lasts, the more harm will be done to your children.

• Print
• Comments
• Trackbacks

Minnesota is a no-fault divorce state. A divorce will be granted in Minnesota without the necessity of proving that one of the parties is guilty of marital misconduct. In earlier times, a party to a divorce was required to demonstrate that the other spouse was at fault for causing a breakdown in the marriage. Adultory was by far the most common basis, but others included domestic abuse, abandonment and an inability to consumate the marriage.

Today, a party to a divorce in Minnesota must merely demonstrate that there has been an "irretrievable breakdown" in the marital relationship. One spouse must simply acknowledge as much, and the court will grant their request to dissolve the marriage. A relatively low threshold - and a tough pill to swallow for those who feel that there is no "justice" in their case unless the court takes into account marital misconduct.

Potential clients often ask, "Should I fight the divorce?" Yes, if you intend to do so outside of the legal arena through counseling or therapy. Once it is obvious that the marriage cannot be saved, your resistence should be limited to that which is necessary to obtain a favorable court order. Not wanting the divorce can be used as leverage against your spouse if they are anxious to conclude matters. Often, the impatient spouse will buy a quick resolution by making an extremely attractive settlement offer. This strategy should be balanced against overdoing it. If you are fighting the dissolution process out of anger or spite, you are likely to cause significant economic and emotional harm to you, your spouse and your children.

• Print
• Comments
• Trackbacks